Untamed Heart (1993)

Christian Slater (Adam), Marisa Tomei (Caroline), Rosy Perez (Cindy), Kyle Secor (Badguy)

Directed by Tony Bill (Must Love Dogs)

Slightly stalker-ish, introverted orphan guy meets slightly desperate, been-dumped-on waitress. They fall in love. Oh, and he thinks he has a baboon's heart. (Blame the nuns.)

Stupid, useless, shite for brains, evil, asshat, mother puss bucket, shit kissin' film.

Good: Christian Slater. Luminous, edible, perfect.

Bad: He FRIGGIN' dies. Piss off, already.

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