Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End (2007)

Johnny Depp (Jack Sparrow), Geoffrey Rush (Barbossa), Orlando Bloom (Will Turner), Keira Knightley (Elizabeth Swann)

Directed by Gore Verbinski (other Pirate things)

Plot: Rah-rah team! Rescue Jack from the undead. Go!

Go watch the funniest part of the movie and save your bootie almost three hours. The logic of any given scene was inherent only on the moment. We'll trade Will for Jack! Sure! But... um, why? We'll give Elizabeth to the scarred captain! Sure! But... um, why? Oh, it doesn't matter. I think I'll watch Johnny playing all Cap'n Jack fun. The surreal bits amused me, as did the excellent, long-rumored cameo and his guitar.

Tom Hollander played an excellent and proper English villain, although his motives remained a little muddled. I kept thinking about him all tubercular in "Wives and Daughters." AW, wretched, doomed Osborne! Naomie Harris played with the fake voodoo accent and became Attack of the 50 Foot Woman, and Bill Nighy finally got to show his face, poor guy. Chow Yun-Fat looked great, but his pirate accent did little to help with my understanding of his intentions.

And after three movies' worth of establishing Elizabeth Swann as a fantastic kick-ass heroine, they leave her character with absolutely no resolution. Was she knitting doilies and sitting on the chest, trying to get off to Turner's heartbeat? I mean... c'mon. Give the girl an option to sustain her next ten years. Sigh. I liked the second one better, if only for the more imaginative visuals because, honestly, they have little else for me. Just not my boat, I guess.


Fang Bastardson said...

Here's the thing - shorn of their spectacle and Johnny Depp's performance aside, there is no there there. Saw the first one on the big screen, opening weekend and enjoyed it despite its flaws. Tried to watch the second one on DVD and it was just painful. And word is, III is more of the spectacle and less of the Depp.


Ann(ie) said...

See, I loved it. I didn't think any of them had a story worth writing home about. If you go to these movies expecting them to be tightly written, then you're doomed to disappointment. That's like expecting quality acting from Pauly Shore.

They're swashbuckling adventure movies, heavy on action sequences and characterization. In that regard, I thought the third one was the best of the lot. Yes, of course the plot had holes large enough to drive a truck through, but that's sort of beside the point.

Did you stay to watch the special ending bit after the credits? Elizabeth gets her resolution then.

Jess said...

Okay, I did love the movie but not as much as the second one, although there was more pirate scheming and backstabbing (despite the all-mighty code... ::shushed whispers:: the code! the code!) BUT even though I did stay and see the special goodness after the credits, I have a hard time believing that Elizabeth Swann after becoming swashbuckling pirate queen in awesome get-up, would settle down just waiting for Will to come back. While the secret ending left me all like "AWWWW!!!" I felt completely heartbroken and upset. ALTHOUGH, Will Turner as sexy pirate captain was awesome. Goes to show what good placement of eyeliner can do for a guy. ;-)

carrie_lofty said...

Argh! Orlando Bloom is NOT sexy! No matter the eyeliner!