Thursday Thirteen: Birth of My First

Tuckered outFive years ago today, I gave birth to our first daughter, Juliette. Today I go to her first parent-teacher conference. Time is weird. Here are thirteen things about that day.

1. She was born the same day Senator Paul Wellstone (D-MN) died in a plane crash. We watched the coverage ad nauseum throughout the day.

Sneaking food2. The nurses told me not to eat food because most patients have epidurals and it's not good to have food before anesthesia. But I was was set on natural childbirth, sent the anesthesiologist away, and ate bagels when the nurses weren't looking.

3. My doctor chewed out the nurses for not getting my room ready for delivery. They didn't get a lot of natural childbirths at that hospital, and she was upset that the nurses didn't understand how fast it could go...once it's ready to go, that is.

4. At one point, sometime in the morning, I took a nice hot bath. After about a half hour I heard snoring from the other room--tandem snoring. It was Keven and my mom asleep on the couches, taking a quick rest while I had my soak.

5. I had to tell Keven to turn off "NewsRadio" because I couldn't stop laughing. Laughing = loss of concentration = PAIN.

Walking6. We walked the halls. A LOT. We arrived at 2am and I was able to walk for roughly twelve hours. That's too much time spent looking at the same banal hospital artwork. (Dude, I had SUPER long hair back then.)

7. At about 2pm, the doctor suggested that she break my water. I was tiring, and she thought that might speed things up. Turns out I wasn't entirely dilated, so afterwards I wasn't allowed to push. LONGEST DAMN 45 MINUTES OF MY LIFE.

8. Juliette wasn't presenting well for delivery. I wound up on my knees for another 45 minutes until she flipped. That was quite a long stretch of time too, come to think of it.

9. In the midst of pushing, I was floating away on the mix CD I'd put together for the delivery. No hippie new age shit, mind you. Proper tunes where I could sing along and kinda meta-state concentrate. One was "Ojos Asi" by Shakira. I was singing along in Spanish, and Mom asked me if I knew what she was saying. Yes, I said. But I didn't bother to translate. Too busy. Later there's a part where she sings in Arabic. I sang along to that as well, and mom asked if that was Spanish too. No, it's Arabic. The nurse about popped her eyeballs out staring at me. Yes, yes, I learned Arabic for a song. Now hold my legs, dammit!

10. I ripped in places that should never... no. Ow. Too painful to think about. Let's just say that sometimes there are abnormal birth injuries that even happy endorphins cannot erase. I needed multiple stitches and wound up with a massive hematoma.

Posed with Star Wars toys for ultimate cuteness11. Juliette was born to "Scoundrel Days" by A-Ha. The lyrics (below) are eerily creepy coz they're about waking up in a strange place--you know, like being born.

BTW, have I ever mentioned how much I like the word SCOUNDREL? No? I will.

12. She laid on my tummy and lifted her head. I said, "Aw, she has Keven's upper lip!" It's true. From Day One, she's looked like a female MiniMe of Keven.

13. At 4:16 PM eastern time she weighed 7lbs and was 20 1/2 inches long. Tomorrow we head to the doctor for her five-year check-up to see how much she's grown. I bet it's lots.

Happy birthday to my sweetie!

I've got blood in my hair.
Their hands touch my body from everywhere.
But I know that I've made it, as I run into the air.
And see...as our lives are in the making.
"Scoundrel Days" by A-Ha

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